When you feel bad, you are thinking about things in a negative way . These thoughts , and not what actually happens, are what make you feel upset . Dr. Albert Ellis has called this the ” A-B-C” of emotion.

”A” stands for the” actual event” – this is what actually happened . Let’s assume that you got .

”B” stands for your ”beliefs” about the event . You may be thinking , ” It ‘s all my failure. What will my family and friends think of me?”

‘C” stands for the ” consequences” of your beliefs including the way you feel and the way you behave. You might be feeling sad and ashamed , and you may crawl into a shell and avoid people because you feel so inadequate and unloveable . As the following diagram, illustrate your thoughts and beliefs make you feel the way you do:

”A” (Actual event = divorce)

”B” (Belief =” I am no good”)

”C” (Consequences = depression)

Your thoughts and beliefs about the event create your feelings . If you had thought , ” It’s all his fault – he’s a self – centered jerk,”you would feel angry and bitter rather than sad and ashamed.

Cognitive therapists have developd powerful techniques to help you change the way you think and feel.

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