Some people often say,’ I don’t deserve compassion,’ ot’I’m too angry inside to be bothered with compassion,’ ot ‘It’s difficult ,’ or’It’s weakness.’ ‘First ‘I hope I’ve shown you that it’s not a weakness . It’s really about how we stimulate our brains and create certain types of relationships , not just with other people but also within our own heads- with ourselves. And if you think about our basic description of our compassion then what is weak about that? If you think you don’t desrerve compassion it is like saying you don’t desreve to be fit or have a healthy diet.
In fact, if you are depressed , you are the person who deserves most compassion. Think about just how much easier it would be for you if you did get on with other people ; if you felt better, how much energy you might have to be able to help other people in this tricky life.
It is also important to remember to practise and there are various ways to do this. One is to remember your commitment to become compassionate each day-saying your mantra before you get up , and running through a sort breathing exercise and compassion focus , I call ‘two minutes under the duvet’.
Write on the back of your hand ‘ pay attention to kindness’ ; hold a stone or something else small in your pocket so that every time you put your hand in there you can feel that and remind yourself of your intention to become the kind of person you want to be in this world while you are here.
Place a ‘compassion candle’ at the end of your bath so that while you are in it you can practise your compassionate imagery work. Find a smell you really like and then when you do your soothing rhythm breathing, put this onto a handherchief and smell it . Then during the day , stop for a moment , take out the handkerchief , slow breath, have a smell and recreate the friendly facial expression and voice tone.
I will complete in article 3 soon.
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